Longtime senior NBA insider, Adrian Wojnarowski, recently announced he was leaving his ESPN position to manage St. Bonaventure University’s men’s basketball program. When asked why, he responded: “Time isn’t in endless supply and I want to spend mine in ways that are more personally meaningful.”
It’s a wise person who can recognize the often dissonance between what is truly meaningful and that upon which one focuses time and energy . . . and then make subsequent life changes. The obvious first step is to determine what holds meaning for oneself. There are a host of items in any individual’s value system, so integral to the task is to affirm and prioritize them. And then act accordingly.
The tricky thing is that our brain can trick us. A man can think (tell himself) that the relationship with his wife is very important to him while spending an average of two hours a week doing things with her and twenty hours a week fishing or golfing. A woman can think (tell herself) that a lifestyle which supports health and longevity is important while never exercising and consistently overloading on sweets, tobacco, and alcohol. What these examples indicate is that what we think we think is not always what influences our actions.
There are two thought modes: conscious and subconscious. Conscious thoughts are those of which we are aware. Subconscious thoughts are those that are real but hide beneath, so to speak, conscious thoughts, and which can be brought to the conscious level if we think about them. For instance, one might subconsciously embrace the value of keeping the yard groomed, yet consciously choose to spend all Saturday afternoon watching sports on TV while the grass and weeds take over the property. If noticing the overgrown yard pulls the subconscious thought of the value of good stewardship out of the depths and the property owner makes the decision to watch TV instead of firing up the lawnmower, it is an affirmation of what is truly more important to the individual.
Mr. Wojnarowski could continue in his esteemed position with ESPN, but it would be accompanied by the sacrifice of what obviously holds more meaning, hence fulfilment, for him. I got the feeling that he had been suppressing for some time the subconscious desire to manage teams rather than talking about other folks doing it.
What are your deepest values? What holds the most meaning for you? What is really important to you? Once one delves honestly and deeply into those questions and comes up with self-satisfying answers, then comes the critical next step: acting on them.
Comments